i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
You may now shotgun with the bride
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
