dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
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Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
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I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.