I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
