i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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