My friends, they love my intelligence
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
