what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
