Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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