Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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