thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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