I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
