So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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