She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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