How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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