i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
