He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
We were destined to go to rehab together
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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