i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
