Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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