Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
