I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
