I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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