I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
