the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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