Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
