that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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