and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
