Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
