Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
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