her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
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