My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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