Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
