I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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