She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
