if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Sext me about skeletons
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
