I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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