I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
