I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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