I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
