i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
