I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
