so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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