My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize