Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
