4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize