Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Even my vagina gasped.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
