I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
