Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
