thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Randomize