YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
