i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
