Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
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