I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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