Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
