this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
As shirtless as possible
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
